There are times when everything is going well but most of the time the thing that doesn’t fit in is just you. Depression may be because of tough times and some times you just can’t help it- it just happens. You loose appetite. You don’t know why you are feeling sad, helpless and hopeless. You are just shrouded by this negative veil that makes you look at things the wrong way.

The things which I am trying to implement now since I feel really depressed and my normal life has stopped functioning:

  1. Listening to music: I am trying to stay from the sad songs. I listen to up beat, strong inspiring songs that help me lift my mood temporarily.
  2. Doing what you love: I try to read books. Though truthfully, it is just 0.5 % of how much I used to read before. At the very least I am trying to read again.
  3. Arrange Outings: Plan your calendar. Keep it packed so that you don’t even get the time to ponder over the unnecessary thoughts. Use the weekends. Leave a day to replenish and for your self and the other to go out and have fun with your loved ones and friends. Meet your old friends.
  4. Do what you want to: There are things that we want to and think of doing. But we always procrastinate it for another fine day. Just do it.Trust me you will feel great if you do something out of the ordinary. I went to a 5K Music Run(by VH1 and Fastrack) this weekend with my room mate and it felt amazing!
  5. Comedy: Watch or read something funny. Be with people you have fun with. Try to stay away from people who always complain about things and people.
  6. Let your emotion flow: Don’t hold back. Cry. Scream. Throw a tantrum. And then Laugh. People who look at you weirdly and don’t try to understand don’t deserve to be in your life.
  7. Talk: You need to talk. Don’t try to hold it in. Talk to the person you feel the most comfortable with. Sometimes talking can help you look at things from a different perspective. If you are not comfortable with that either then I am here. You can always talk to me. We can stand a top a table together and look at things differently.

If you cannot deal with it at all then I would suggest that you take some professional help.It will help you.

Carpe Diem my friend. There is nothing more important than your happiness. It is how you reach there and stay there that matters.

I Cried


A rain that made the rivers flood and gush down the mountains. Mountains that no one could move but stood weak as it broke into two halves bit by bit.It called out its last in anger to the hot molten lava like heart within it. the heart sprayed its sadness and breathed its last breath into the air as the sky turned dark. Just because I cried. And I cried again seeing the sadness of the world. And I will cry again in the hope to take away the world’s misery and anguish. I will cry again. To end. The sadness.

Or do I instead wait for the peace to fall upon me.The Sun to shine bright. To see everything and think everything clearly. To fight back instead of washing away even the good along with the bad?

This is not just about the gay community out there. It is also about that woman who is beaten around by her husband. It is also about that man who is mistreated in the work space. It is about all the wrongs that go about in the world. The wrongs that we all know about but don’t react to.

What do we do? What should we do? Tell me in the comments section. I want to hear your thoughts.


You are a really cool person! :)

You are a really cool person! 🙂

*Crack Knuckles* I have been gone for a long time. Those who read my Doodle Diddle text box know that I have been sick. i generally think about what to post for a few days before posting but today I am going to let it flow. No thinking before hand. Let me tell you a small story about a little girl:

Once upon a time there was a little girl as happy and oblivious to the world as you could find.Over the years this little girl turned into an insecure person. She thought about what the society might think or failure before actually taking a step. All this inferiority complex came down to belief. She had been lucky to have parents who believed in her. They trusted her to make her own way and yet their love and support for her had lead her to be so dependent on them almost to the point of being spoon fed-till date. I don’t know if all this is because of some harrowing experiences that she had to face as a child. She had always been in a loving environment when it comes to family and had some lovely friends but the world outside is harsh. Something that a little girl could never imagine. She had to go through cases of molestation by some elderly figures as a child. Most of them were in the position of being looked up to as a profession. This is something that little girl could never explain more than as being “played with” and she was always brushed aside and told that “she must have made some mistake”. This making a mistake saga went on you see. When it came to problems with friends- this now a grown up girl had to face some serious back stabbing. She lost her voice. She was so scared to raise her voice that she could not stop others from doing mean things to her. They pushed her around like a rag doll. Using her. Breaking her even more. But “you must have done something to make them do this to you” never stopped. Some days she had enough courage to make a stand and the rest she slouched down-sitting alone and trying not to be noticed. She hid all this from her family because it would break their heart. This little girl has grown wise though.She has grown tougher than she was before. She is slowly trying to make her stand. She still has a long way to go and is still pushed around. But one day she hopes she will be respected and loved by this harsh world as much as her family loves her. That one day may not come soon but she is chipping away the hard stone. Working hard to make her own comfortable niche.

You must have realized. I am that little girl. When the others don’t believe you it is sad. But when you don’t believe in yourself? It is a sin. I won’t say I am a confident person. But I am learning how to believe in my self. Will you help me in this journey? Will you show me that one can learn how to believe in themselves-by doing so yourself? As I have mentioned in Your mother programmed you ‘s comment-very lucky few have people as crazy as them as friends and family. Someone who actually knows them and loves them for who they are. Can you be your own friend? Can you accept yourself? Answer these questions. I hope the answer is a Yes and if not – I am willing to be one 🙂

Music going on in my head: Long time coming by Oliver James

Don’t Judge

Hey guys! At last I have managed to find the time to breathe and write to you guys out there. I won’t say I don’t judge people. I do. Judging is like that annoying buzzing fly that doesn’t go away. Oh but it does. Eventually. I judge, but the very next instant I chide myself. I think to myself that what if there is something more to it? You should never jump to conclusions based on what you see. Every person has a story. All you need to do sometimes is get to know that story and your whole thinking changes. A person speaking in broken language may be laughed at. But if you listen closely you may realize that you are actually listening to a wise person.

A person incapable of forming speech but infinitely smarter than you. If you listen you may actually learn a few things.

I came up with this because it has been nagging me since past few days. I was talking to my friend when she showed me a photo of a popular couple. The fault in my friend’s eye was that the woman was dark and the man was fair. She laughed and showed me the picture saying “Are they trying to play chess?” It annoyed me to no end. I asked her if the guy was dark and the woman fair would she have said the same thing?She didn’t reply. No they aren’t trying to play chess. Maybe they like each other? Before you try fixing someone, acting as if this world is your board and you are holding the chalk and duster so that it makes it morally right for you to throw about your unwanted opinion, look at yourself .You also have a lot to change so maybe try using that chalk and duster on yourself instead of others.

I took up this topic with another friend of mine. She did support the fact that one shouldn’t judge. It made me happy thinking that not all are that narrow minded. Till it slipped from her mouth that ” I don’t mind her being dark it’s just that she is fat.She should do something about it” Oopsie. I was wrong . I realized then that my friend supported my “being dark should not matter” line because she is dark herself. This same friend was overweight three years back but she lost oodles of weight and is stick thin now . I thought that her suffering from weight issues for a year would stop her from passing such a judgement. Then I realized that she never worked for it. She just doesn’t like the taste of the food here so she eats less and throws more into the trash bin. She lost weight within months. I explained it to her that the woman may have tried loosing weight and she may have a disorder that her from loosing much weight. She looked away before waving her hand and rolling her saying  “maybe”. She may have realized her mistake but not how wrong she was.

So stop judging. You may actually depress someone without the intent to and cause  a lot of harm.Before you judge think whether you like it when people judge you. You don’t right? And those people out there who get judged regularly. Keep trying to improve yourself but don’t take what others say to your heart because you know what you are going through. But that doesn’t mean that you can make excuses. Keep working you will get the results you want or rather need 🙂

stop judging

You are NOT alone

You have people with you

You have people with you

Loneliness…the word it self makes one feel sad and depressed. Today I wake you to a beautiful day and I realize that nobody’s lonely. There is an ocean full of people out there and sometimes when you live alone you may feel more lost. One day you are feeling lost in that huge crowd when suddenly you are hugged from behind and that dark cloud passes away as you turn around and see the bright smiles and excitement and the true happiness on your friend’s face as they look at you. You are never alone. You may be passing through a difficult situation and you find there is nobody there to help or guide or support you. First sit back and think. Did you convey your suffering to anyone? Most of us feel that any person close to must know when we are sad but you should understand that they are not mind readers, they are also humans like us and you need to put your pride or shyness behind and talk to people.

Learn to talk and share 🙂

Some time ago I had some amazing news that I wanted to share with my closest family and friends, but when I called them nobody responded, they didn’t have time to even listen to my news. Some had a job to go to, some babies to take care of and whole lot of other excuses. One of the best days in my life was spent feeling lonely and crying instead of celebrating. Then night falls and I start getting calls from all of them, one by one,  and the way they sounded so happy I felt my heart would burst. The one’s I thought had ditched my were the one’s who truly were happy for me. I was even wished by people from unexpected sources.

When you feel lonely just remember your blessings- the best times in your life and always know that there is always some one to look out for you. Don’t expect people to always come over to you. Learn to talk to people on your own accord and even after reading this you feel you don’t have anyone then Hey! go out there and make new friends! There are always people who have the same mindset and maybe are waiting to be found just like you. 🙂